User blog:Neymia/Caren

''Oh god's be damned. This cannot be! I do not know what to do. Is he really what he claimes to be? But that is impossible. Do I really have to face the fact that God exists? And if he does then WHY in the seven heavens does he never help us? All this time I have been abused by the master, all this time I have cared for my family, all this time I have done things to save others, obeyed my Master, taken orders from my superiours.. And where has He been, all this time? Why doesn't HE care, instead of me? Why do I have to have faith in a god who is ignorant of what happens here? And if he isn't, then how can he be good if he just lets it happen?! I don't know anymore. I just don't know. Maybe, just maybe, I should.. No, I can't, it's against my nature! I cannot.. I will not.. Maybe I should.. Well.. Why should I not?''

I'm going to pray.